Tuesday, December 22, 2009

The White Tiger

Friends, Indians and countrymen ( and country women, just to be politically correct!)

I have understood the much sought after sure-shot recipe to winning Booker prizes and Oscars. (Courtesy : Aravind Adiga, the white tiger! ).

Firstly,try all means and exaggerations to "expose" the "shady" parts of "India" - I need to explain - like one fine morning you discover that your colleague in office is actually a gangster with underworld connections or better still, that your posh residential colony was invaded by beggars over night (Ssshhh, now thats definitely an exotic takeaway..that by itself can take you to the top of the hot list.. When in doubt, sprinkle in some beggars! )

Secondly, please please forget that there will be others who have lived and breathed in the same city that you are talking about. Please, now this is instrumental. You should follow some psychic techniques to convince your subconscious mind of this and then, my friend, unleash your dark creativity.

Tell the world that air in Bangalore, Mumbai and Delhi bears the stench of gangsters and beggars right to the core, oh yeah, "bloody" stench, by the way ( vocabulary is extremely important, you will see!)

And last but by no standards least - shovel in liberal heaps of "fuck" ,"arse", "crap", "shit", "bloody" and anything else that makes you want to throw up your dinner. And if you could manage the combinations like say "bloody crap" or "fucking shit", then my friend you've made us proud. You are nearly there! I can see the "bloody crap" you've written winning the "fucking" prize!!

A white tiger - he may well be, but definitely a dead rotten one by my standards!

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Greeny Blues

I look across from where I stand - It's all the same!

Endless stretches of little cubicles, stern faces, knit brows, eyes fixed on screens and fingers typing off furiously. Invariably, everyone here has a coffee mug, coffee stains from long long ago. The printer in the corner of the room screeches away incessantly. This is a crazy world!

I feel totally out of place. I wasn't meant to be part of this. I just wasn't made this way! It depresses me to think that this is where the rest of my life will be, irrespective of what my heart desires! How I would love to be out in the open, in the woods, near the stream, by the lake, on the hills - uh.. just about anywhere but here!

I have no choice but to stare at what this geek stares into. "Indoor plants help increase the positive energy in your work place" - reads the screen.Ah, so I see!! Wonder if any one's bothered about what happens to my energy amidst these buzzy machines and fuzzy minds!

- A little unluckly bamboo plant who was picked up to sit indoors and ironically called "lucky bamboo".

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Say Cheeeeeese!!!!

I've often been told that a picture speaks louder than a 1000 words. With due respects to all the brilliant photographers around, my friend, I beg to differ. A good picture definitely is a piece of art and is impossible without an acumen.

But the point is - what did the picture manage to capture?? A three dimensional experience in a two dimensional stratum - And, sir - that to me, is gross deterioration in the quality of the experience no matter how many pixels were used to capture the scene.

While I appreciate photography and understand its importance in illustrating and recording events, I disapprove using it extensively as a personal record.

Well, memory has some moments etched in it forever - say like your first bicycle, farewell to your best buddy, your graduation day at college, your first crush, loss of a dear one etc. While you may not remember the exact shade of the dress you wore or your hairstyle or any other irrelevant paraphernalia, memory definitely has the capacity of preserving that moment - in all its fullness, it all its glory, in all its life. And clicking a photograph of the moment wouldn’t do justice to it at all. I am rather amused at people's frantic attempts to squeeze real lively moments into dead pixels - they sure do have a fulfilled look when they have done it though! Thats even funny.

Photographs are useful if you want to show a friend the kind of place you went to for holiday etc, but again, it cant get any more personal than that. People recording their child's first smile, capturing a video of their first steps etc. - Very sorry, I refuse to appreciate it. Wasn't that a wonderful moment that you had rather enjoyed thoroughly, instead of fiddling with your camera clicking it and preserving it?

Firstly, you failed to enjoy the moment thoroughly - second, you tried to kill the moment and successfully put it to the grave.

Fine, you may see that over and over and over again and show it to your friends over and over and over again.... But, thats nowhere near to have allowed your mind to have taken it in completely, experience it relaxed. No advanced technology is required.. We were sent in with a built in feature, you see!! Thats like a High Definition auto filtering high memory system that stores just what is relevant, just what you enjoyed and cuts out the crap.

Having said that, I love beautiful pictures... Scenaries can take your breath away when the right eyes have frozen the moment. Photography is undoubtedly an art - one that demands a real artist. Some pictures are powerful in what they depict and it is very necessary..

I would like to drive home the point that photography is a very useful and powerful tool, but it is easily abused and thats the point where it gets a little silly.. Say for eg., you went on a holiday to India and instead of having a good look at the Taj Mahal, you get jazzed up about clicking a snap of yourself in front of the monument, to may be post it on some networking site or sharing... That to me is pathetic. You may well take a photo of the Taj, just like how you would take a memento from there, nothing more, please!

The other flipside of freezing personal moments is that it curbs imagination. Imagination adds this magical possibility and shade to the moment. It adds perspective and a tinge of individuality. No two people can imagine something exactly the same way. Why nip that lovely feeling?

So, the next time you talk to your five year old about the moment you won say an athletic event, you have two choices – Let your child imagine how you looked, how you must have felt and see his eyes light up with wonder, encouraging his imaginative faculty or hand out a picture taken on the day, extinguishing his imagination, tricking him into believing that the piece of paper says it all, watching as his eyebrows knit to have a careful look at the picture, picking up the irrelevant details and missing the fun and the spirit!

The choice after all, is yours!

Friday, February 13, 2009

Yes, Your Almighty!

Never heard anything more crazier - Synthetic Biology.

Oh ye scientists!! Dost not thou haveth better business?

Synthetic Biology refers to both of the below
the design and fabrication of biological components and systems that do not already exist in the natural world
the re-design and fabrication of existing biological systems.


Now, this opens avenues that apparently are dreams come true.. but sometimes, isnt it better that dreams remain dreams? The research is now on reproducing bacteria... which poses enough problems... And I wonder, how can one regression test the damn thing?

Farfetched I hope and wish - but should the thing catch up - then, no more heartbreaks due to lost love - Just forget her and re-create a "synthetic her"!!

And, no more can people be murdered. I particularly like this stupid possibility... You murder someone, I take that person's formula and re-create that person again,and flabbergast you!

What's worse, you just kill the real hubby/wife and recreate another that agrees to you all the time!!! No one will hardly know, ofcourse if the synthetic spouse doesn't crash or something!!

I just wish and hope synthetic biology remains restricted to stupid science fiction and Hollywood at the most! Its too bad to be allowed to get real.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Jack and the Beanstalk

A friend and I had been to this pantomime last evening - enjoyed it to the bits! We had an enthusiastic 3 year old near us, popping out of his chair everytime the wicked magician came! It was funny to see him all nervous with clasped hands, whispering prayers for Jack as he climbed the beanstalk! He even ran up the stairs to tell Heidi that "bad men" were hiding behind her!!! That kid stole the show, really - kept his poor ma on her toes running behind him all the time. He strongly believed that his intervention could change things in the tale - totally oblivious to what the rest of the audience said or did !! Innocence breeds unquestionable confidence - indeed!! indeed!!

Spring flowers

First signs of spring - the little cyclamen on my kitchen window sill has got a couple of new buds.. The little snowdrops on the pathway have little white flowers peeping out too... noticed it on my way to work yesterday..

Though the landscape outside continues to tease one like a mischievous pretty damsel in a foam bath - all under white, but for bits here and there, its nice to see these little cheerful signs..

Shall wait, shall wait... for her to rise from her bath in all her fresh beauty... to sweep me off with the captivating cheer of a naughty child...